Things That Make Lish Cringe #2: Raccoon Eyeliner

May 7, 2012 by 2 Comments

Have you ever been walking down the street or across campus or looking in someone’s windows and thought to yourself, “Man, that girl is wearing too much eyeliner!”? Well I certainly have, and it always concerns me and makes me want to rid that woman’s house of every kind of black makeup that she owns, because it’s not that hard to get crafty with mascara or eyeshadow or nail polish. Okay maybe not nail polish, but you get what I’m saying. Because this phenomenon is all too common, I am dedicating this post to Raccoon Eyeliner.

You may be asking yourself, ‘What is ‘raccoon eyeliner’? I’ve never seen that color at the makeup counter at Walgreens!’ Well that’s probably because it’s not a color, it’s a fashion trend I don’t understand. Here’s an example:

From left to right: Avril Lavigne, a raccoon on the red carpet, Taylor Momsen

Don’t even get me started on the trainwreck that Taylor Momsen presents us with in that picture. I mean, what makes you wake up one morning and say, ‘I have to go to a red carpet event, let me slop on the eyeliner so I look like a fucking vampire,’? I just don’t get it.
Taylor Momsen aside, this look doesn’t work on anybody. All of those little scene girls running around with their colored hair, choppy layers, and raccoon eyeliner just need to stop. At the very least, just stop wearing the eyeliner. It makes you look stupid. Which you undoubtedly are.
Whether you’re scene or you just don’t have any mirrors in your house, this makeup trend is something that needs to be stopped. I wouldn’t say it’s worse than leggings as pants, but it’s pretty damn bad. Buy some makeup remover and take that shit off of your face. Unless you actually are a raccoon. Then please, by all means, keep doing what you’re doing.

Slut.

Filed under Stories, The Lish Dish Tagged with , , , , ,

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